About FYM!
When I was just out of my teens, the universe, in its infinite and mysterious wisdom, saw fit to trust me with two babies. Sixteen years later, we are all still alive. As wished for by my mother, I’ve ended up with smartasses, just like me. Stories ensue.
The Cast:
Me: Short, Chubby, Brunette. Mom, Checkout Girl, Writer, Crafty Bitch. Fond of dirty jokes and dirty words. Obsessed with pop culture and cartoons. Born without the little voice in my head that should tell me when something is inappropriate to say. Completely unqualified to parent.
Teen Boy: Tall, Thin, Long Dark Blond Hair. Smart, Serious, Introverted, Clumsy. Musically inclined with hand/eye coordination like whoa. Hates to clean his room, loves pizza and Dr. Pepper. Occasional glimpses of the man he will be are awe-inspiring.
Teen Girl: Tall, Thin, Blond. Popular, Pragmatic, Precocious, Verbose. Quick to point out others’ mistakes. Also quick to forgive those mistakes, as long as the person is well-aware that they are making them. Never forgets anything. Ever.
My official entertainment bio, which is braggy:
Jennifer Lemons is a writer, comedian, and storyteller, living on the East Coast.
She is the author of the popular series 100 Bad Dates that appeared on RVA News.com, and currently writes the weekly column Off The Clock for the same site. A regular contributor to Belle, Style Weekly‘s monthly magazine for women, and a featured blogger for Dodson and Ross, a sex positive website created by sex educator, author, and artist, Betty Dodson.
In addition to writing, Jennifer loves to tell jokes. She has a twitter following over 5,000 strong as The Checkout Girl. She was voted “Best Local Twitter Feed” by the readers of Richmond Magazine in their Best & Worst 2010 issue, “Best Female Twitterer” in the RVA News.com‘s RVA Internet Awards, as well as “Best Local Undiscovered Twitter Feed” by the readers of Style Weekly in their Best of Richmond 2011 issue, and is listed as one of “Our Favorite Comedians” by popular comedy website FunnyOrDie.com. She was also a speaker on Social Media Club of Richmond‘s panel about alter-egos in media.
Jennifer also loves to be on stage. She was a featured performer in Richmond Comedy Coalition’s series “Richmond Famous“, which was reviewed by Style Magazine. She was a headliner in “Prisoners of Love”, a one night only live comedy/storytelling show about doomed relationships. She is currently writing “Loosely Based On A Real Girl”, a one-woman show, set to debut October 2011.
Got something to say? Email me at effyeahmotherhood@gmail.com.
HeatherVonsj@gmail.com
I’m glad to hear your children are smartasses. We definitely need more. Hearing about your kids gives me hope that mine will become smartasses one day too.
Twitter: homesliceva
/ Feb 22 2010
so glad this bitch is finally up and runnin’. proud to be part of the FYM! community.
I had no idea you had kids, I thought you were living life free and single. What you can learn in a day…. Congrats on the new blog!
Twitter: wendyly
/ Feb 23 2010
My kids remember everything too.”Remember 78 years ago when you promised to buy me a car if I helped a little old lady across the street while wearing toe socks and unmatching flip flops?” I don’t like it, because I can’t remember anything ever.
I also had no idea you were a Mom. This makes me want to go back and re-read TCG’s post for the third time for any clues… the second re-reading was to find clues as to where you are TCG! Still no clue.. though I’ve narrowed it down. I’m looking forward to hearing your stories of what mine will be like in 9 – 10 years! Wishing you all the best!
Lucky you! Living what I always tell my kids is The Mother’s Curse: “May you have kids Just. Like. You”
Your mom must be so proud!
Carlyhoo – I’m tricky that way! Hi!
Twitter: tarabitesback
/ Apr 29 2010
OMG, you’re like the queen of the universe. How do you have time for 12 blogs and columns and all of that awesomeness??
Twitter: undineocean
/ May 30 2010
I added you to my blogroll so I could read you every day. You are awesome. Your posts cracked me up the other day, especially the one about sex and the single momma. Since I used to be one, I totally feel ya.
<3
J -
thank you. ideally, I’d be posting on regular days, but I’m hit by inspiration at the oddest times. usually after consuming large amounts of coffee. well, inspiration and poo. I hope to see you again!
Twitter: lookitsbray
/ Jun 18 2010
You had me at “fuck”
BRay -
If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard that, I’d have one nickel.
Free spirit, cool mama who swears!
Alex -
All mamas swear, but most do it behind closed doors. Thanks for coming behind my closed doors. Welcome to Team FuckYeah!
Twitter: Richmondmom
/ Aug 15 2010
I love you because you are hilarious, gifted, crafty . . .like ice is cold. Keep up the good work mama.
Thank GAWD! Another mother who admits freely to using a menagerie of dirty words…and feels no need to apologize for it! Sometimes I feel compelled to “explain” it – I usually just tell people I have tourette’s syndrome (tee hee hee). Rock on, sistah!!
I found you through Absence of Alternatives. It’s clear after reading one or two sentences (sorry, ADD is a mother) that I will be a fan. Years ago, I wrote one entry of a blog (again, that pesky ADD thing) called “Life in the Checkout Line” because 1.checkout lines are the epicenter of the universe 2. I spend a lot of time in them because I always choose the wrong one.
Your site is excellent! My quest in life right now is to sort through the superficial bullshit and find real life moms. Glad I found your blog!
Twitter: krrobi
/ May 7 2011
~You are a girl after my own Heart
Love love love a sassy bitch!
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